When My Life Changed

Sarah Combs

" I'm sorry Sarah, but i have bad news," said the doctor.
" What's wrong?" I asked.
" We don't see a heartbeat, your daughter had passed," said the doctor.
" How can this happen? I was just at the doctor's two days ago, and he said everything was fine, the heartbeat was good" I said.
" I don't know why these things happen, but we will find out what exactly happened after she is born," said the doctor.

Although I knew the beginning of my junior year was going to be difficult, knowing that I lost my daughter just made it worse. I thought school was going to be hard, beause it is unusal for a girl to get pregnant at Indian Hill or at least get pregnant and stay in school. I decided to stay in school so I could finish my education and graduate from a great school.

I first found out I was pregnant in May of 2008 and really didn't know what to do I was just a 17 year old girl who hadn't graduated. I didn't know how i was going to be able to finish school and take care of child at the same time. The parents didn't want my boyfriend and me to have the baby because they wanted us to finish school. My options were to get an abortion, or to keep the baby. I had to go through a lot of arguments with both parents, because they wanted me to get an abortion, but I refused because I don't believe in that. I made the decision to keep it and stay in school. The parents accepted my decision after they knew I was for certain I was keeping the baby.

My Junior year started, and I knew it was going to be difficult. A lot of the students didn't know I was pregnant, and I was afraid of what they would say when they found out. When the students found out, it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I had classmates whom I never really talked to actually tell me that they looked up to me because I didn't get an abortion and stood up for what I was doing. They were glad I didn't give up and just quit school; that confidence made me work harder. School got harder as my pregnancy progressed; I was always tired and couldn't concentrate as much. I forced myself to stay awake to get all my school work done. I knew I had to work hard in school so I could get my high school diploma and get a good job to raise my daughter. All my teachers were very generous and helped me when I really needed it. I showed them that I could work hard in school and deal with a difficult situation.

It was getting close to my due date and I knew I had to get some of my school work done before I left. I worked hard for a couple of weeks with school work that I didn't have to turn in for a month or two. I always hated making up school work, so I thought I'd be productive and finish it ahead of time. The week of my due date was the worst week of my life. I went to school February 5, 2009 and noticed I hadn't felt my daughter kick. I wasn't too worried about it because I heard that babies lack movement sometimes when they are close to being born. My mom called the hospital and told them my situation. They told me to get to the hospital as soon at possible. I didn't think anything was really wrong, but I just wanted to make sure. When I got there, they put me in a room and searched for the heartbeat. The nurse couldn't find it, so the doctor came in and tired to find it with an ultrasound. my life crashed after that moment in my life when I found out my daughter didn't make it. I will never forget that day.

Soon after I found out my daughter had passed they started my labor. Everyone was worried on how the outcome will be, but there was no choice but to deliver her and find out exactly why she passed away. After six hours have passed I was finally ready to deliver her and I was scared. I wasn't prepared to go through delivery like this and now knowing how the outcome will be.

" Sarah you are ready to deliever your little now," Said the Doctor

Not long after the doctor told me I was ready to deliver, I had her and right then we found out why she had passed away.

" Sarah the umbilical cord is in a knot and we believe this is the reason why she passed. All the oxygen and nutrients stopped going to her because the knot cut off everything," Said the Doctor
" I have never heard of an umbilical cord going into a knot before, I just don't know how this could have happened," I said
" I am guessing that it happened when she was smaller and was able to move around and she just moved around so much, which for the cord in a knot," Said the Doctor

I have learned a lot since I for pregnant and after losing my daughter. I learned to cherish every moment in life like ti could be my last. You just never know what life will bring you. I had to learn that at a young age, but also by losing my own daughter. I never thought this would ever happen to me in my life. Since I lost my daughter I have been helping organizations which involve losing a child. Also, I have helped out other families who have lost a child. It's nice to know that I am not a lone and I have other parents that can talk to if I ever feel depressed, but also it's sad to hear other families go through what I have. I know going through all I have had made me a stronger person. My little girl has motivated me to accomplish my goals in life.